dimanche, décembre 17, 2006
♥ i am selfish. self centred.
i'm quite tired actually. but this is only a mini test from God lor. compared to the others, i think this is only 1/5 of what they are going thru. at times, i'll just hope that i didn made that decision. ha. yep. during encounter last 2 weeks ago, God was really challenging me to do that thing. He kept encouraging and assuring me that 'I CAN DO IT!' sure, i decided to take up that challenge initially but my whole prospective of 'em changed after that week. i know that He wants me to love and show grace to them. i tried. but i couldn control my emotions. although i've said during the encounter and youth camp that God can 'TAKE IT ALL' and i 'OFFER THIS HEART COMPLETELY TO YOU', it seems as if i'm snatching it back from God once again. i lack of the confidence once again, i fear of failure again. this is taking up too much energy. i know i cant run away from this problem cos there will definitely be a same problem which i'll go thru, it's only a matter of time lah. God wants me to go BEYOND and not stay stagnant. i just told someone this afternoon that i don't want to do that thing, i rather not grow spiritually den go thru these. i know that God is upset bcos of what i've said cos i really felt a burden lor. they are also God's children. sometimes it's also best if i'll look at the positive side. and this can only work if God empowers me. God's trying to give me the fruit of the spirit. LOVE. etc.
LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.
LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.
11:59 PM