jeudi, décembre 13, 2012
♥ Final Week / Day in School
Time flies, time flies.
Gonna sit for my last paper tonight (unless i *touch wood* dun do well in my modules this term). i really have this fear, hate it.
As of now, left w 1 assignment, 1 open book exam, and my MAJOR project which is the most major one!!!! due next monday morning 9am (cos i'll be out playing from that day onwards!)
back to the topic, it's been 27 months since i entered SIC / RMIT / stansfield! and i really understand what the tcher said on e 1st day of school on 27 Sept 2010 monday evening, "after getting through every term, you'll realise that these 7 terms will past very quickly...." true to that, but sadly, hate the changes.. meow..
and you know what, i think.... i will bring my instax camera tonight, the first and the last time to school.. (well, i really want to!) HAHA even though i've been in e same class and even went to Melb twice, i never liked to take pictures or hang around with them cos.. i am anti social.. hahahaha really. i really think so. and sadly, i didnt really care.. meow.. oh well.. i have been waiting for this day, to shout and make lotsa noise on my final paper, but i have no confidence.. what if i fail my last 2 papers, or i dun submit and do a good job in my FYP. actually the biggest fear to me is.. not getting a good class, i am so dead.. ok, i shall not start on these "if i had known" or "if only" statements, cos... it's how i managed my time (lousy) and i need to be accountable for my own actions lah..
the thing is, i dunno what to look forward to after this term. like, i always knew where i'm heading, that's why i do my best, but now.. the future is a bleak and i cant seem to do a good .. finish... i mean, e.g. i'm at a 10km run, i can run my first 2km at 15min, den 5km at 1hr, but at the 10km, i will be running at 3.5 or 4 hours.. its like, i cant get the best result at the end... maybe i've been too focus on the finished product that i forget the process, but to me, what's the point of having a good process when your ending sucks? this is what i've been thinking about for the past 8 years (HAHA OMG)
When i was in sec 4, i rmb writing a composition for 1 of the english papers, and i rmb writing these down "it's not about the process, but about the ending" [about someone who won a medal and came back to school to announce...] after i got back my script, i was shocked at my attitude yet kept consoling myself that this is just a compo, not true in real life. but yet... i look at the result and judge ppl (or myself) and ignore the process / hard work that ppl / i put in... until... i get scared of the outcome / ending and just shun away from it. haiz, if you understand. ok, bye.
Do your best, and let God do the rest.
(at least i wouldnt have regrets in future when i do my best! better than nothing... :p)
--
10pm
ok, i actually wanna blog about my last paper, cos it's super worth blogging! but i am lazy to type out a lengthy post, tweeted at least 7-8 tweets about it. drama sia. lol. anyway, will type it out when i'm more free. i need to redo my FYP now, remember?... sad...
bye, 2nd upper class. bye :(
--
14 dec, 5am
another thing to be thankful.
thankful that i blog consistently, HAHA. some posts really encourages me, and just reassures me of what God has done and that His hands will never stop doing works in my life.
--
530am
zzzz i actually teared just by reading one of my post in Nov 2010. it was living hell then. i cant believe that after 27 months, i am almost done with University :') will definitely blog / write on my diary. ahhhh, getting a little too emotional here. :")
Gonna sit for my last paper tonight (unless i *touch wood* dun do well in my modules this term). i really have this fear, hate it.
As of now, left w 1 assignment, 1 open book exam, and my MAJOR project which is the most major one!!!! due next monday morning 9am (cos i'll be out playing from that day onwards!)
back to the topic, it's been 27 months since i entered SIC / RMIT / stansfield! and i really understand what the tcher said on e 1st day of school on 27 Sept 2010 monday evening, "after getting through every term, you'll realise that these 7 terms will past very quickly...." true to that, but sadly, hate the changes.. meow..
and you know what, i think.... i will bring my instax camera tonight, the first and the last time to school.. (well, i really want to!) HAHA even though i've been in e same class and even went to Melb twice, i never liked to take pictures or hang around with them cos.. i am anti social.. hahahaha really. i really think so. and sadly, i didnt really care.. meow.. oh well.. i have been waiting for this day, to shout and make lotsa noise on my final paper, but i have no confidence.. what if i fail my last 2 papers, or i dun submit and do a good job in my FYP. actually the biggest fear to me is.. not getting a good class, i am so dead.. ok, i shall not start on these "if i had known" or "if only" statements, cos... it's how i managed my time (lousy) and i need to be accountable for my own actions lah..
the thing is, i dunno what to look forward to after this term. like, i always knew where i'm heading, that's why i do my best, but now.. the future is a bleak and i cant seem to do a good .. finish... i mean, e.g. i'm at a 10km run, i can run my first 2km at 15min, den 5km at 1hr, but at the 10km, i will be running at 3.5 or 4 hours.. its like, i cant get the best result at the end... maybe i've been too focus on the finished product that i forget the process, but to me, what's the point of having a good process when your ending sucks? this is what i've been thinking about for the past 8 years (HAHA OMG)
When i was in sec 4, i rmb writing a composition for 1 of the english papers, and i rmb writing these down "it's not about the process, but about the ending" [about someone who won a medal and came back to school to announce...] after i got back my script, i was shocked at my attitude yet kept consoling myself that this is just a compo, not true in real life. but yet... i look at the result and judge ppl (or myself) and ignore the process / hard work that ppl / i put in... until... i get scared of the outcome / ending and just shun away from it. haiz, if you understand. ok, bye.
Do your best, and let God do the rest.
(at least i wouldnt have regrets in future when i do my best! better than nothing... :p)
--
10pm
ok, i actually wanna blog about my last paper, cos it's super worth blogging! but i am lazy to type out a lengthy post, tweeted at least 7-8 tweets about it. drama sia. lol. anyway, will type it out when i'm more free. i need to redo my FYP now, remember?... sad...
bye, 2nd upper class. bye :(
--
14 dec, 5am
another thing to be thankful.
thankful that i blog consistently, HAHA. some posts really encourages me, and just reassures me of what God has done and that His hands will never stop doing works in my life.
--
530am
zzzz i actually teared just by reading one of my post in Nov 2010. it was living hell then. i cant believe that after 27 months, i am almost done with University :') will definitely blog / write on my diary. ahhhh, getting a little too emotional here. :")
11:03 AM
